I know we are 'ready' for a baby and when we were trying, we never doubted we wanted a child. I'm not doubting it now, I guess I am a little scared because this is the biggest decision we have ever made and probably will ever make.
I know in about a month I will be gushing over our little boy and can't imagine life without him, but this is me being selfish.
I guess I'm writing this to see if anyone else had or is having these same thoughts when they were about to have their first child. Also, so I can look back at this in a year and laugh at myself for getting upset while watching the Journey episode of Glee on Youtube and bawling my eyes out when they sang 'Right down the line it's been you and me.' True story.
I hope no one takes this the wrong way and thinks I'm an ungrateful biatch because truly I'm not. I am having a lot of mixed emotions. I can't sleep at all at night anymore. The superficial me lays awake in bed just thinking about who he's going to look like and what color his hair will be. Other times, I lay awake thinking if the outfits we picked out for him for the hospital will be cute in pictures. Yeah, welcome to my head.
OK, I feel better now. You should know I don't handle change very well. But I'm sure this change will be the greatest I have ever experienced. Thanks for listening.